Tag Archives: Kids

Post-apocalyptic Xmas quotes 2012

Christmas quotes from a large family in a small midwestern town. Christmas Eve: I’m very useful. I have a cheese knife. Can I borrow your key to grandpa’s gun closet? My mouth is hot. Tomorrow you kids can shoot each … Continue reading

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There Arose Such A Clatter: Xmas Quotes 2011

Real quotes from a large family Christmas gathering in a small midwestern town It’s too fluffy! I’m used to having Mexican painters in the house. I thought you were a sheep! Is your face okay? I nearly always will be … Continue reading

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Workers Only

Coming home from work is like opening a treasure chest. Or Pandora’s box. Or a radioactive barrel of snakes, monkeys, and laser beams. I don’t know what kind of life Forest Gump’s momma lived, but it wasn’t like mine. It’s … Continue reading

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Playing With Fire – Part 2

Playing With Fire – Part 1 As I grew older, making and controlling fire became more complex, as did my tactics to hide my activities. The best thing about cheap telescopes is what’s inside:  awesome fire-making magnifying glasses.  I started … Continue reading

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Playing with Fire – Part 1

I used to* light things on fire when I was younger.  The best fires were typically made without my parents’ knowledge or consent (bless their hearts).  I blame lack of color TV or video games for leading me down this … Continue reading

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